Auto Cashier

Despite the fact that in shopping centres throughout the world there are cashiers losing their jobs due to automation, umm I'm sorry but I just love doing it myself. I find myself buying smaller amounts just so I can scan my own stuff, muck about with the credit card payment thingy and generally enjoy playing cashier for at least a small part of a day. You see when I was about 17 I had to work in order to pay for my schooling so I did the only thing I was qualified to do, oh and probably still am, work at Franklin's as a cashier, aka, "check out chick". It was definitely up there with one of the most fun jobs I have ever had. Strangely I got the job through a friend from schools girlfriend and the store was nowhere near where I either went to school or lived so therefore I never had the embarrassment of having someone I knew come through my checkout so I always felt comfortable and enjoyed the job without the scrutiny of people you really don't want knowing you have such a lowly job. It was in the days when scanners were new and there was no such thing as paying by credit card or eftpos. In fact I can remember people paying by cheque and I was always impressed by how much money some people seemed to have.

Though I guess what interested me most was the string of love affairs I had with boys who also worked there part time. You know the freezer boys with those big all in one padded suits, oh the fun times, oh the freezing cold conditions at lunch time but oh the fun times and oh how I will never look at a frozen chicken the same way again. Oh okay okay get your mind out of the gutter we just played chook lotto it was harmless but not always for the chickens. The job also cemented my fetish for fresh clean new money. I am a big sucker for new money, the smell, the touch and the feeling of it in your wallet, lovely. So I guess that is why I now find myself playing check out chick at every shop I can possibly find that provides an automated check out, I speed beep my stuff and use one plastic bag per item, Fuck the Planet!. So thanks to me kissy pooing with a lot of boys in the freezer at Franklins in my youth the world is going to be sinking about 2 meters into the ocean due to my pathetic plastic bagging and lack of employment for those less fortunate students out there, umm yeah sorry about that, Not!

Note: I realise it is a little late, about twenty years too late but sorry again to the woman's azaleas that I destroyed whilst at a Franklins end of year party that I stumbled out of with a freezer boy. I recall we landed in her wonderful garden across the road. She did come out waving a broom at us and I will forever feel I blew her chance to be apart of Burke's Back yard one day so yeah sorry bout that.